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random thoughts

It’s kinda hard to realize that not everyone in your family is understanding and supportive. 

I’m fat and everyone thinks that it’s their duty to tell me that I have to lose weight. And they all know what I have to do to be thin. And they talk about it a lot, like really a lot. Every conversation ends with advice and lecture, that being fat is bad and unhealthy. I’m so sick and tired of that. They never talk to me about anything really interesting and fascinating, they only torture me and my self-esteem.

Yesterday they judged young couple where a boy was thinner than a girl. They laughed how unhappy and stupid the boy is for choosing that kind of girl. I WAS SITTING NEXT TO THEM! I AM FAT (the girl wasn’t, she was slightly overweight)! It felt like they were laughing at me. And they don’t have second thoughts, that it is actually offending and highly unpleasant.

You can’t choose a family. And in the end you can’t explain them anything. It’s sad, that they don’t want to listen, to understand. And I’m slowly giving up. And I’m happy that my mom and dad are different from others in family (at very least they never say anything judgy, they only support me) and I really wanna make them proud.

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